Dear Reader,
"Quiet, Theodora," She whispered. "Try not to disturb the children."
Theodora nodded her head, and she sunk into her rocking chair. Quietly, she rocked back and forth, gazing out of the dormer window. Below were the chants and shouts of children playing in the dew-covered grass. They smiled at each other, and their thoughts were only filled with what game they would play next. The Woman peered behind her and tapped her feet on the plank floor.
"Don't you have any hobbies, Theodora?" She asked.
Theodora nodded her head without listening to her mother. She loved her home. Acuity Manor sat on a humble hill. Large, white pillars towered in the front, and bricks were set into the walls precisely. White trim adorned the edges of the windows and the doors. In the front, a semi-circle of pavement was etched into the ground, and it traveled down the hill onto the nearest street. There were never any cars in the driveway. Theodora slouched in her chair, ruminating.
"Slouching is terrible for your posture, Theodora." the Woman said condescendingly.
Theodora nodded her head out of habit. She did not care for what the Woman was saying, for every word that came out of her mouth was scalding and dangerous. When she wasn't looking, she would roll her eyes at her, and she would purposefully disobey. Hate is a strong word, yet what Theodora felt was very near it. She missed being a child. The Woman was so much kinder then. She fed her snacks and traveled with her. They watched horse races, and they gardened in the back lawn. Every morning before school, they would dance in the foyer, and they would sing in the kitchen.
"Are you listening to me, Theodora?" the Woman practically hollered.
She wanted to scream back. She wanted to say that she wasn't listening and that she never would. Instead, she nodded her head quietly. Compliance came naturally. Her mind was always racing, and she did not have the time to talk back. The woman had lived peacefully with her for eighteen years. Those years were burned into her mind vividly. On weekend mornings, they sat together in the library, and they read. Theodora used to love to read. She couldn't bring herself to do it anymore. Later, the Woman would teach the girl writing, how to cross her t's and dot her i's. Each stroke of the quill was so natural to Theodora, and she wrote with her head held high. Now, she could hardly keep her head up alone, nevermind while writing.
There was one day in particular, which she always thought about. Like her constant worries and memories, it never left her mind. It was the day she was supposed to move away. To leave Acuity Manor for the first time, and to survive on her own. She awoke early in the morning, as there was a carriage awaiting her in the front. She stood by the pillars on her porch, and she ran toward the vehicle. Before she left, she needed to say goodbye to the Woman. So after she settled her suitcases in the carriage, she returned to the Manor. And, she called out for her mother. There was no response.
"Look me in the eyes, Theodora, listen to me." the Woman said behind her.
There was no time now to nod. She remembered the thoughts that flooded her mind as she scavenged the house looking for the Woman. As she looked, she took careful time to scour every room. The foyer seemed small now, and the kitchen was cold. As was the library, and her tiny reading nook. There was a pile of papers on the floor of the library near the entrance, their pages blank. She stepped over them cautiously, and she slowly moved upstairs. As she approached the Woman's room, she called out again. There was no response. Quickly, she opened the door.
Lying in the bed was the woman's body, so peacefully still. Her hands were cold, and her pulse was gone. Gray hairs covered her forehead and over her eyes. A vile sat beside her bed, turned over, dripping onto the floor a dark liquid. She always knew that the Woman wanted her to stay, but she didn’t think it would come to this. Theodora wept forever.
"I am right here, Theodora." the Woman insisted.
She turned her head softly to face the Woman. Behind her was a barren, chilly room with dark walls. The voice of the woman was gone, as was her eyes, her face, and her body. She was never there. A wave of realization hit her like a torrent, and she knew she could not avoid it any longer. Slowly, she turned back to the children, and she brought her hands to her face. Carefully, her eyes turned to liquid as drops of sorrow clouded her vision. The voice of her mother rang in her ears, each word enonicatied louder and louder, until she could no longer hear herself think. Swiftly with her fingers, she began to rip out her hair from her forehead as she started to scream to herself. Then, she gathered up her ire in her hands, and she picked herself up out of the chair. She began toward the dormer window, where she screamed once more. She screamed for a childhood gone. She screamed for her mother. Out of fear, the children outside ran away. As her last shouts cascaded from her lips, she no longer had the courage to speak. Silence filled the air as her mind went blank. Gone were her memories, gone were her worries.
Acuity Manor let out a sigh of relief as Theodora let out her sorrowful grievances down through the window. A quiet wind swept through the house carrying white pages from the study. Hurriedly, the pages flooded into the attic where she stood. They swept around her like a storm, and they settled like the rain. She looked onward out of the window without notice. Her mind was as blank as a page.
Sincerely,
The Ghost of a Forgotten Woman