Lazy. Distant. Dumb. Sad. Not your average words to describe me. Yet I am these words. When someone looks at me, they see a girl with bright blue eyes, strong arms, red hair, glasses. If you know me, you expect me to be smart, loud, focused, always happy. I am this. But there is another side to me that only I know. The side who has problems, feelings, stress. Everyone wants, needs, me to be happy and helpful. Everybody is too busy to deal with another person who is annoying and needful. So I make them happy. Do what they say. Stand out and be myself. I am this. I try to be this. I like to be this. But I can’t always. Sometimes, alone, I can’t stand it anymore. I waste my time watching pointless t.v. shows instead of doing my homework. I cry. It’s understandable, right? Well, I think so at least. But can anyone else think so too? Am I allowed to be this person, this person who makes mistakes, messes up, wastes time? If the world were perfect, maybe I could. But it isn't. So I am left to fend for myself, be who they want me to be, who I wish I truly were. It isn’t as easy as it seems. I try my best, but I don’t always succeed. I hope you will help me and all the others out there who want to be able to mess up and not be perfect. Maybe you’re one of them. If so, I just might be able to help. All it takes is a little time to read my story.
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