However, I am not plain
I wear bright blue skirts and yellow shirts
And watch you say my name
Words knock the life out of me
Grin makes me cry
Say you don’t care about me
So why did you come tonight?
I read your poems
The messages and words never sent
I saw my name hidden beneath the black colored rant
You say that you’re over me
You say you don’t care
But you cry over little things
Am I really still there?
Would I really still care?
If you needed me there.
But my darling I am Outcast
Because I am strong
I fight for my happiness
I cry when it’s done
So next time you message me
Even If it’s to start a fight
I will respond with “You’re right”
And turn off the lights
Leaving all memories behind.
As it fell I knew it was the end.
As it fell I had to face the worst.
As it fell my life fell apart...
I cried for her
I cried for me
I cried for our whole family
She wasn’t something
I was willing to
But I had no choice
No one knew
Which way her life would go
I couldn’t take the room no more
So I sat alone on the bench in the hallway
I thought of every moment we had
From birthdays to holidays
You never missed one
So I sat alone on the hallway bench
And so scared
I walked back in
I sat with her
I waiting with her
That’s when it fell
I watched that ring fall
And her heart stopped beating
I ran to grab the ring before
I was forced out
That was the last I saw her alive
But I have the ring on now
I’ll always have it on
Next to all my other rings
But this one matters the most
Engraved inside it read:
Stay strong, I love you
I’ll never forget the smile on her face
When I gave it to her
And she sure did
Today my lips are sealed
Words closed off from the world
No more expressing how I feel
They seem to think I'm "bold"
The water keeps on falling
The lights are bright and high
But today is the day
When I forget how to cry
Once before my lips have closed
But triggered by a massive fear
That the world would surely hate me
That my voice would not be clear
But as she pushed me down and picked me up
My silence was so loud
So this is the day I WILL make the decision,
to finally have no sound.
I sit outside the empty palace
The palace that helped a family grow
This palace that a family loved each more than anything
A palace where there was always smiles
I’m set outside this palace
I try to think of what it would be like now
It’s starts to drizzle out
I sit outside the empty palace
The palace that helped my family grow
This palace where we loved each other more than anything.
A palace where we always smiled
I’m set outside this palace that I called home
And I start to cry
Now my palace is empty
No father to teach me to work
No mother to comfort me on the couch
No brother play with me
Now it’s just me
The palace where a family had money
The palace where a family had everything
The palace with a family grateful for all of it
The palace where our money was happiness
The palace where everything was family
The palace where that was all we needed
This palace all I call home
This palace was my everything
This old beaten done house I call home
This old beaten done house I wish was still my everything
In my heart this old beaten done house is my palace.
It's like a waterfall that has trouble falling.
It's like wind that doesn't blow.
The feeling runs deep inside your body and flows through your bloodstream.
Some call it woe
As his hands wrap around your heart.
As he takes it in his hands.
His fingers wrap around it.
This kind of love should be banned.
This feeling won't last forever
The sun and the moon say
But my heart still feels heavy
My stomach still feels drained
I think I have a name for it
It's definitely not woe
They say this feeling won't last forever
Some say to never let it show
Heartbreak...this feeling is heartbreak.
My figure radiated insignificance, terror. Yet, clutching a blade black as the witching hour, the passion raging through my veins gave me the courage to raise my head. Slowly, inch by inch, I thrust my chin up, until my eyes locked onto the visage of evil incarnate.
That was what they called me, long ago. But I wasn’t a monster. I was a girl.
The creature, emaciated, skeletal, glowered at me - its legs little more than bones, stray bits of flesh dripping off, tattered, still encrusted with specks of blood. Its ribs and hips plunged outwards, the sallow skin wrapped around it sagging like a blanket loved to tatters. The shroud strewn across its pallid body personified frozen tundra - blank, perfect white, illuminating the decayed yellow of its fingers all the more clearly. And it’s face…
I was only a little girl - a raven-haired child whose days were enhanced by joy, innocence, before I understood the dark place the world could be. I dreamed of heroes in brash, bold colors, shivered at the fearsome, feral beasts lurking in the dark. At the end of the day, I raced into the warm, rose-scented arms of the person who loved me unconditionally.
I was just a girl.
Its skull, as I watched, crumbled on upon itself, bit by bit, bone softening, flaking away like plaster until only half of the head remained, the rest a cool, carved dish. Strands of oily onyx tresses shivered away into the darkness with the skull.
The monster’s throat contorted as a pig -like squeal swelled from its throat. It mourned the loss of its hair.
Empty eye sockets blazed towards me, faint traces of red glazing their edges.
The stranger was found bobbing on his back, face bloodied, limp and lifeless.
The captain fished him from the waves herself, hauling him onto her ship, her prized vessel - the Harp. The crew clucked and hustled about, making room as she laid the man out across the deck and at once sank to her knees, listening for a heartbeat. When she found none, she at once began to press against his chest, alternating between compressions and breaths. The captain never surrendered to death without a fight.
Nothing. His waterlogged lungs would not yield. His heart remained stubbornly still.
Press. Breath. Press. Breath.
Just as she turned away, defeated, crestfallen - the stranger gasped.
She instantly swung back, held him as he coughed up harsh saltwater, drew in a great, heaving breaths, shook the water from his eyes and hair, and slowly, almost fearfully, surveyed the audience with narrow grey eyes.
“I’m Captain Chance Muirenn.” she murmured. “You’re on the Harp. You’re safe now.”
“Humans?” rasped the stranger. He was still gasping softly, as though unsure how to take in air.
Captain Muirenn raised one pale eyebrow.
In response, the stranger shuddered once and hesitantly, almost fearfully, touched the captain’s cheek.
As the fresh scent of ocean air drifts into our car, my eyes flutter open. For a moment, I almost forget where I am. But the ferris wheel in the distance reminds me, and I smile. The car slows in front of my condo, and I stumble out of the car, still drowsy. I grab my suitcase and run up those familiar steps. My room still looks the same, and I put my stuff in the same drawers. My swimsuit is right on top, so I slip it on and run outside. I slather on my sunscreen, and run towards the roaring sound of the waves. The sound draws me in, just like the pull of the ocean. The beach is empty at twilight, and it's my favorite time there, because of the way the sunset shimmers on the water. The waves are soft at low tide, and warm after a hot day. I sink into them. I walk back to my condo, shivering, and grab the shower before anyone else can steal it. I relax under the stream of water, and I watch as the sand whirls away.
I stroll toward the boardwalk, and the sounds and smells overwhelm me. Seagulls squawk and kids scream on rides. I smell chocolate fudge and ice cream. A long night of rides and fun induce dreams of funnel cake. The bed that night is not mine, but still so familiar. Reasons like these remind me why the beach is my home.
A small child huddled in the corner. About six years old. Small pin clenched in her hand. Olive skin bruised. Blue eyes tainted gray. Hair the color of night pulled back in a braid. Face shines with horror. She had never been anywhere outside of her own house. She did not what to change that, but the circumstances were grave, and if she doesn’t make a run for it. It might be her last mistake. Tears creep out of her eyes. The loud bangs and crashes don’t make her feel any better.
“THAT’S IT!” She hears a man’s voice bellow. The girl trembles.
“Please spare Sashimi,” A woman’s voice pleads. The girl’s head turns to the sound of her name.
“Oh please!” the man replies, “She’s next!” The girl knows she needs to make a run for it. She unsteadily stands up. Her head just barely reaches the table length, she’s safe. For now. She runs to the open door. As she runs out, she can hear the sirens coming from the outside. The loud bellowing from the sirens makes her tremble. The streets of the small town are full of cars and noises. She sees the other houses and they all look the same. The first thought she has is, “I need to get as far away as I can.” She runs. She runs as fast as her little legs can carry her and as far as she will be able to go. She stumbles and falls on the sidewalk. She cheek begins to lightly bleed. She looks up and a woman holding the hand of another small child.
“Oh! Are you okay?” the woman asks.
“Y-yes,” Sashimi replies shakily standing up.
Words can cut and hurt
but I won't hide or hit the dirt
I still walk with my head held high
Even if inside, I pause to keep in my troubled sigh
I prove every day your words are meaningless lies